Behind the Bar

I am not coming back just yet. I feel as though I want to take this moment to paint you a picture of where I am at in my life.

Chicago. And it is f*cking amazing.

*Think of this painting description as more of a expressionist ideal portrayed with the colors of a certain Piet Mondrian. If you don't follow art or what each period stands for then please look it up or silently exit my site.

Till we meet again...

I have decided to take a break from blogging for the time being. I need not come up with some lame excuse as to why I have decided to put my incredibly hilarious, sometimes cynical, a lot sexy, but mostly judgemental writing style on halt. I just am. I'll grace the world again one day when you least expect it. For now I say adieu.

Unabridge

Otis

Neighborhood: Union Square

25 Maiden Ln (between Grant Ave & Kearny St)

San Francisco, CA 94108

In the Know: I should start by saying the size and layout of the space is fantastic! It is extremely intimate (ie. if you go here you must be comfortable with shoulder to shoulder with complete strangers.) I did find the design a but unusual, though. A cluster f*ck of things; separately they are all pretty cool, but once together the theme of the space gets lost. If there even is a theme. The name Otis came from a pimp that used to live in the same neighborhood as the owner. Maybe since pimps are eccentric in life and style the bar had to mirror that? You be the judge. After entering through what only could be described as dungeon doors you would pass a corridor lit by deer antlers. If you decide that you don't want to check your coat or sit on the comfy white bench seating in the hall, you will definitely want to see whats going on with the three vertical and mysteriously lit coral installation wall. This does really look pretty cool but as I said earlier too many random elements can get confusing....

Behind the Bar: As previously mentioned my neighbor is the bartender of this pimps palace. What this means, I pretty much grilled him a lot more than I would have any other person. Apparently it wasn't all that bad because he hasn't egged my house...yet. He said the only thing that he didn't like about the space was the depth of the bar. On the side where the customer sits, the overhanging lip looked like it was only half a foot deep. Not enough room to really comfortably put your legs anywhere. (How I see it, this pushes the bar stool further into the space so the customer doesn't have their knees jammed up against it. Not the wisest of things if the area is already reduced in size.) What I noticed, the height of the seats in comparison to the bar was way off. I did not like the feeling that I could just lean in to sip on my cocktail. Drinks should not be consumed from a horizontal front, they should be approached in an upward and then immediate downard motion.

Who's Who: This would be the absolute perfect place to go if you worked on Maiden Lane. Just think, done with work by 5:30pm...drinking by 5:32pm. And from what it looked like, that is exactly what those Maidenians did. The bar offered a great after work social scene, one that allowed for chatting up people you may or may not know. It also offered an excellent chance to indulge in a little more intimate one-on-one setting. So immediately after you meet someone you can take them upstairs to get away from the hustle and bustle of the folks still in search of their match. Kinda sounds like a cheesy dating reality show, right?

Unabridged

In the Know: Let me just start out by saying, WOW! Where the hell has this kinda design in San Francisco been? I mean everything was spectacular, spectacular! And I am not just saying that because one of my favorite local SF designers (Mr. Important) did it. Oh, no no no. Each and every minor detail was attended to as if it was a cuddly bunny nestled in the bossom of a rock star design. From the colored menus to the lighting scheme to the multi-leveled dining/bar areas to the incredible bathroom, Mr. Important left no proverbial stone unturned. Lets begin at the bar as that is obviously my favorite place to be: When first doing my research (i.e. looking at their website gallery) I immediately thought it was over designed with a cluster f*ck of materials. Not the case at all. Since it is two times higher than it is wide all the elements really start complimenting eachother superbly.

But wait! Don't think that is the end of it. After a bottle of wine, the design went from great to a-mazing as I ventured around the rest of the space. The upstairs dining area had a completely different feel than the bar. The brick walls surrounding the space were illuminated from the bottom, a fantastic effect called grazing. What I love most about the walls is they were encased behind glass. It made it look as though the whole wall was its own art piece. This gave the upstairs a very dark and vibrant ambiance. ...

Who's Who: As much as I love going out, I have this weird thing about waiting outside a restaurant for it to open just so I can start drinking. If it was a minute before I got there that's totally fine. It was open, im cool. But waiting for them to open the doors and invite me in, sucks. This, of course, happened at Gitane because for some reason they don't even open until 5:30pm. (If they only knew how many people they could pull in if they opened just 30 min. earlier. Think about it boys...sitting outside in the 70 degree weather in the middle of the winter, kinda priceless) Luckily, I was not the first in line. A nice group had gathered outside. From what I saw, an impressive after work crowd. Ages looked from mid 20's to late 40's. Mostly all dressed up. Mostly all needing a break from a hard days work. Everyone kinda had their own thing going on which made it pleasant to sip on some wine in the presence of great company. But I suggest making a reservation or arriving shortly after it opens before embarking on this visual extravaganza. Space is limited.

And to you, chatty Cathy sitting next to me: Guy, I am trying to discuss politics, religion, and sex with my girl friend and most certainly do not need to hear another peep outta you about your sweet digs in Tahoe or your workout regime or how much coke you just finish doing. All those things is better kept to yourself.

*Well off topic but genius! Have to love the way some men think.

Hi, Hello! You probably are wondering where the F I have been for the past month. (and if you haven't well that just hurts) Yes, I have be extremely delinquent in my postings. Sorry folks! I wish I had some amazing story to tell you like I met a man and got whisked off to the Greek islands taking nothing with me but my bikini and 4 bottles of rum. (if there is any interest in that please contact me and I'll send you an application;) But alas that would not be the case. I have, however, been stuffing my face with chocolate and alcohol all month. Using the alcohol to forget about the fact I can't stop eating tasty desserts, and the tasty desserts to help keep me from going overboard with the alcohol. I think it is really a win-win situation. In the new year, I plan to keep it real while keeping it sober and in turn keep more up to date on my postings. (Subject to change and/or termination without notification) For now, I'll say my adieu to 2008 and welcome 2009! See you all next year!!!!

Unabridged

The first I have ever heard of this place was from an anonymous comment on my "I have been flagged" review. It read, "i posted a review of 'candy bar' based on my perceptions of walking by it, reading their menu, and concluding that the place looks like jcrew and wasn't a good fit for the neighborhood." I, obviously never being one to judge, couldn't possibly pass up the opportunity to check out a place that was both full of a certain J Crew wearing type of people in a neighborhood that is not exactly J Crew friendly. And having one of the best HH's I have ever heard of doesn't hurt either. I needed to investigate. First impression: I could not see J Crew in the people at all. I could, however, see where someone might mistake this place for a retail shop. Could it be the over sized book shelf looking object used to divide the front lounge from the back tables? It does look as though it could have housed several sweater vests and polo's on it. Possibly the bar and furniture wood accents? The sharp angular edges and color does come off a bit Banana Republicy. How about the lighting scheme?...

I have talked to all parties that either own or operate this place so if I was to gossip, it would be oh so juicy. However, as previously mentioned, I talk to them every week now. I wouldn't want a high school he said, he said (to my knowledge it is all men that work there) kinda situation. So to save all parties from a civil war, I am going to give you just what I think. Isn't that all that matters anyways?...